The Cleanout

Because Adam was an only child, and his Dad remained single after Adam’s mother left them when he was just a toddler, cleaning out the old house was something we knew we’d have to do just the two of us. In some ways it’s a dreaded job, because there was just so munch stuff that had accumulated since Adam’s grandparents purchased the house in the 1930s. As much as the cleanup was a big job, it was a rewarding one. We learned so much about Adam’s family while going through old mail, photos, and treasures. 

The little bedroom upstairs and the kitchen during the cleanout.

We started by ordering a 30 yard dumpster. Although there was so much that we kept and will pass on to our children, there was also much that had to be thrown away. Old carpet, clothing that wasn’t in any condition to donate, and things that were just junk. I’m a tenderhearted, so everything has sentimental value to me, so it was a challenge not to keep everything. The house is small and for us to be able to live in the house, most of the sacculated stuff had to go, with the exception of the things that were really meaningful. 

As many older people do, Jim collected stuff in his later years. He enjoyed online shopping and buying gadgets that looked neat. He had tons of flashlights, model airplanes, clocks, tennis racket style bug zappers, a variety of fancy nail clippers, dozens of metal detectors, an impressive coin collection, and so many things that he probably never really used, but thoroughly enjoyed. He found joy in browsing eBay and we were happy he had that hobby to keep him entertained in his later years.

In many ways being an only child makes the death of a parent easier. You don’t have to decide who gets what or how things should be done when cleaning out the house, but you also don’t have siblings to help navigate all the things that have to get done after a parent dies, or anyone to reminisce shared memories and grief with. 

I was grateful Adam and I were able to do the clean out together just the two of us. It was emotional but a beautiful celebration of Jim’s life. I learned so much that I didn’t know about Adam’s Dad and grandparents through cleaning out the house. Adam was able to tell stories and I felt like I got to know more about his Dad and Grandparents than I had ever known before. We didn’t rush. We took our time going through photos, looking at old treasures, and discovering things that had been boxed away for decades.

To make the cleanup easier, everything fell into one of three categories KEEP…. DONATE…. Or TRASH. Because we were going to be renovating the house, we moved the keep items into the garage, took truckloads of things to the donation center, and used the dumpster for the the trash items. 

Letting go of things is hard, especially when memories are attached to them. I found myself asking “Will we use this?” And “Will this bring us joy?”  Also, “Would our children want this?” 

One of the things we decided to do early on, was to use Jim’s coin collection and put the money back into his house. His gold and coin collection was substantial, over $30k. I know some people liquidate their parents valuables and use it for something they want or need in life, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but we felt like the right thing to do was reinvest the money into Grandpa’s house and bring it back to life for our children and grandchildren. The house was in the family for 100 years, and hopefully that tradition will continue. 

Although we now own Grandpa’s House, we are just the stewards of the history and legacy that will live on for generations to come.